If you were a novelist...

It's a girl thing, it's a me thing, but it's a thing... I am SUPER emotional. I get sensitive (sensi) as I coined the term, in which it relates to showing any bit of over-reacting or drawn-out emotion that flusters a rather calm demeanor. The thing is with me, I'm never calm. What do you expect? I'm Italian and Mexican (to be stereotypically correct) and I have a constant fire in my belly that is always on the verge of sourcing flames through my blood that boils on-site whenever my passionate heart gets tested.

Anywhoooooooser... I was getting ready to drive into work this morning and I overheard a conversation on the radio about a coworker they never knew was a novelist and it sprung one of my many million thoughts into action... HEY! I thought to myself, why don't you write a book, Lisa!? A question that followed with a demeaning answer "because no one would read it?" The truth is however, someone would read it, but more importantly what would I write a book about? And why am I talking to myself?   Eh, I heard once that it makes you smarter because you actually think through your thoughts and answer your own questions which can help resolve a matter privately before submerging yourself into the public, or maybe I am semi-crazy and just need to own it.

Either way, the thing is, whether crazy or not, I am constantly in motion and thinking about ways to challenge myself. Although I'm not quite there yet, the idea of writing a book has always interested me. I thought of the many ideas for a story line...a topic...would it be fiction or more memoir style?

When I was younger I used to climb trees, (Did I tell you?) and wouldn't stop there. I would climb football posts at the local high school, "No Parking" poles near my home, and even rooftops. Who did I think I was anyways, Spider man? I climbed trees for no reason and for every occasion. I knew I could and the feeling I enjoyed  the most was sitting on the branch or post  many feet above the ground. I was able to see the world at a better view.

Allowing myself a panoramic view of the location I was in just seemed to make sense than limiting a young girl to one-on-one eye-level focus. I have always wanted bigger and greater, and still do. Pushing limits is what I know how to do and writing allows me to expand past the boundaries of limitation. It gives a freedom to exhale every thing I intake daily, who I've become and who I want to be, but more than that, it allows me to say what I want without interruption of anyone, even, myself.

So, if given the chance to write a book, what would I write about? Me.  There's no one in the world other than God that knows me from the inside out. I am with myself 24/7. I am there when I laugh and when I cry. When I feel defeated and when I triumph. I challenge myself, allow myself to evolve and challenge my own skills like no other person on earth, so why wouldn't I use myself as a muse for future stories?

Being you is a gift from God. There's no one else like you. Your trials and tribulations are you own and with great exaltation, you have the helping hand of your faith to help you test boundaries, a mirror to look yourself straight in the face, and a heart to love who you are and the allowance of tears to pour down your face when you finally allow that moment to come to you, because being yourself is your gift to the world and to be yourself, is your gift to you. Let your journey unfold and let your story be told through the novelist, you. I've already made it through a quarter of my life and I still haven't fully found out who I am, but I'm excited for the journey and will continue to write my life's story piece by piece. Hope you like it.

Testimony of Strength

My life may not be perfect, but it's my life, and to me it's as perfect as God intended it to be. My heart gets troubled, I worry and I stress. I suffer illness and I react to things that bother me. I stand up for what I believe in with pure vigor and I love with all of my heart. I'm loyal and friendly and honest and blunt. I am who I am and will not apologize for it. My heart is strong but my Faith is stronger. I appreciate my family more than anything in the world and adore my true friends and acquintances. Picking myself up after troubled times is the only thing I know how to do. I will never give up on myself or my life because it's mine and God's greatest gift to me. The only time you will see me with my head down, is when I am bowing to my Lord, giving thanks.

Standing in Line, waiting for Love...

A few days ago I was scrolling through my IG account and found a picture of my dear guy BFF (Best Friends Forever), yes, we still call each other that even in our adult years. He seemed troubled and disconnected from the world although well connected as it was a social media app, after all. I sent him a text the following morning to see if he was okay. He mentioned his concerns for life. He was in deep, self-reflection mode.

You see, my friend is awesome. And, I'm not just saying that because he's my friend. His life is about as wonderful as it gets and this guy is by far one of the most amazing people I have the privilege of knowing. He's kind, friendly, holds a great job, is financially stable and smart with his possessions, generous with his time and makes friends every where he goes. Speaking of going, he also loves to travel and try new things. Oh, and did I mention he loves dogs? One in particular. A mid-sized Wheaten Terrier, named Bella who is ready to go on any car ride her human papa takes her.

So, back to the text. I responded with deeper concern and asked what prompted his self-talk? Like me, he too, had realized his life was going exceptionally well, and although never discounting what he does have, he was still wondering about what he was missing. Love.

Ahh, the never ending complexity of our lives and what we all naturally seek out, even the cynics. Love. It can seemingly feel like the heaviest weight on your shoulders or lift you up when the rest of the world seems to disappear.

"But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love." -Corinthians 13:13

Love is like the sunlight in my book. It is the source of all things and refreshes all things and brings life to all things but when it fades away, your life can feel lost without it.

To be rich in life is pressure pushed on us from society. We must make money to show precedence. We have to dress sharply to make people see us as successful and we must speak eloquently to show our intelligence, but when we go home and throw our wallet on the floor, strip off our clothes and meddle in the silence of our empty nest, where is society?

Being alone in the silence is the loudest form of noise that is out there. Needing approval is not needed when we are stripped down to our most comfortable pair of sweatpants and allow our disheveled hair to prance around our head. The urgency to hold someone is an ache that runs deep into the core and the lack of just saying "How was your day?" to someone who loves you, can make a error-free task a simple solution to what your day was missing. It can be that source of connection needed to filter out all the advertisements on the billboards, the soap opera dramas of daily interactions, and the perpetual annoyance of hard-working hours day in and day out. To catch your breath and let someone just hold you is the single-least moment of fear that is desired and that everyone should have.

When I concentrate on my friend, I admire his strength to communicate to the universe on his needs and wants. He needs a partner and wants to share his life with someone. There's no other need or want that is greater than that here on earth and when we align our faith, do not give up hope, and Love ourselves, I believe that the Love that we seek will inevitably come.